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| This is the essay series by women living with HIV. The authors in Japan,
Cambodia, Portugal and the Philippines, write about episodes and the
feelings of their daily lives. |
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 I want to spend my days in happiness with those dear to me. That’s my dream.
When I was a little younger, my thoughts revolved around myself-what I desired, what I wanted to be, what I wanted to do, and where I wanted to go. Now, I just want to end the day happy among people who are equally content, saying, “Today was another good day.”
For instance, the people most important to me are my family. But being together is something I take for granted, and I tend to forget to be thankful for them if I don’t remind myself. I used to feel like the peaceful time we spent together would last forever, but I became painfully aware that this just wasn’t true when I lost my husband and then my grandmother a few years ago. So, every day I openly express my appreciation to my parents in words and try to show it in my attitude. To my daughter, too, through my words and deeds I try to convey the feeling that she’s important and that I’ll always be there for her.
The same goes for my co-workers. Of course, there are some colleagues that I don’t get along with but I’m extremely grateful to be able to enjoy my work. I want to be a useful team member, and although that’s really difficult to achieve, I get excited the moment I feel we can accomplish things together.
And then there are my friends. Those who are close by and those who are far away are a source of energy for me. I count among them, of course, my HIV-positive friends in the Asia Pacific region and other parts of the world. I hope to enjoy every day of my life in the belief that those men and women are able to do the same. To do so, it’s important for each of them to live their life to the fullest; personal issues should be solved, but there are also lots of matters that cannot be solved by individuals alone.
Access to medical care is one example. I have personally experienced the difference that receiving ART (anti-retroviral therapy) makes, so I am well aware that there is nothing more important than being healthy. As a Japanese national, I am lucky to be able to receive ART, but not all of my friends are so fortunate. For us it is a matter of life and death whether we all have equal access to ART. That’s why I want to do whatever I can, without giving up because because the goal seems to be difficult to achieve and I am powerless to do anything about it.
I hope my friends and I can live out our days together in happiness. It’s such a simple dream, but so difficult in reality. However, if we keep trying, little by little perhaps we can make a difference.
I would be glad if every person who reads this also thinks of us as friends and does what they can to tackle HIV so that we all can live happily together. |
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