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| This is the essay series by women living with HIV. The authors in Japan,
Cambodia, Portugal and the Philippines, write about episodes and the
feelings of their daily lives. |
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| It’s just a plan… / Riiko |
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 I’m still single without children and don’t have any plans to marry, but I’ve thought out a solid plan for raising my children.
I’d like to take this opportunity to share my dreams for the future with you.
A boy or a girl?
I think two boys and one girl are ideal. I will have to give birth to three children, not an easy task.
Lessons?
The boys will play baseball. I hope my girl will play a team sport that she’s interested in. Well, they’ll all play sports. I want to give my boys a strict athletic upbringing, and I’ll gently tell my girl to go out and exercise with her friends.
Studies?
First, I hope my children will have dreams of their own, so as a parent I’d like to give them all sorts of experiences. When they reach a certain age, I want to ask about their dreams for the future. Of course, it can’t be helped if their dreams are always changing. I want to praise them for having a variety of interests, and as long as they don’t say anything too silly like, “I want to be a dinosaur,” then I’ll tell them what kind of things they need to study. Whether or not they work hard or don’t is completely up to them. If they ask for my help, I’ll do everything I can.
What about Mommy’s illness?
This is really difficult. I probably won’t talk about it, though, at least not until they graduate from school… But, I’d tell them everything if there was a possibility something was going to happen to me. I’ll tell them, “Mommy wanted you so much.”
When they become adults?
My boys will be strong men. I want to raise my daughter to be a kind woman who’ll be loved by everyone. I want all of them to understand other people’s pain, and to be generous people who will do anything for others.
Actually, there is a lot more but I don’t think I can even write half of it here. That’s because I’m still maturing myself. Most important of all, though, I hope the children I might give birth to in the future will be healthy. I think it’s too much to wish for more than that. |
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