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| This is the essay series by women living with HIV. The authors in Japan,
Cambodia, Portugal and the Philippines, write about episodes and the
feelings of their daily lives. |
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 My first meeting was 40 years ago with life.
Meeting the surprising world and discover it was held with some rebel passion. Living life wildly, hedonistically and fulfil it with love.
Then meeting the virus and another state - disease and not be healthy any more even if I feel good.
Meeting love. Meeting stigma.
Meeting with fear, or avoid meeting. Avoid the fear of rejection. Rejection.
Exclusion. The others exclusion. Self exclusion. Meeting loneliness..
To meet or not to meet… now is the question.
But there’s the small perfect things - the sunset, the birds singing, the wildness of the sea, the laugh of a child, the smile of the olds, the green of leaves in the blue of the sky, the red of poppies in the green fields, the faces in the cinema, the eyes of dogs, the touch of other skin, the smell of sea, the smell of flowers, colours… meeting beauty.
And here I am up again and again, surviving through all … meeting again the simple pleasures of life. A small me wondering to dance with life, to embrace the smile of the world…Smiling… crying but above all still living. Still dreaming. Still hoping. |
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